Blast from the Past

Today was a blast from the past. I’m in New York with Lenedra and meeting some wonderful people – all of them with years of experience in music – so a little nerve-wracking when I’m singing along to my acoustic guitar in front of them. But exciting too.

I had some time this morning before meeting anyone so took a walk through Central Park. The weather is stunning right now. And on my way out of the hotel I saw the guy I used to see every day at the desk by the entrance to the hotel during my first visit to New York about three years ago. Whenever I saw Manny on that first visit, I felt like everything about him shouted ‘New York‘. Such a character. Not that I would really know what New York is all about, but anyway, that was my impression of him. And, until this morning, I hadn’t seen him since that first visit.

And tonight, Lenedra and I closed the day with a listening of the demo CD that she heard when she first met me about three years ago. Today was a good day. Not because anything momentous occurred, but more in that I realized that I finally feel comfortable within myself as an artist and a musician, so it kind of marked a moment of arrival. So the two of us celebrated by revisiting the recording that we had listened to together about three years ago on first meeting. I’m pretty sure that was the last time I ever heard the recording (four songs) in its entirety. I maybe returned to it every now and then after that meeting to reevaluate but I’m quite sure I haven’t heard even a snippet of it for at least two years – firstly, there was no reason to as I was always writing new songs and making new recordings, and secondly, the recordings would make me cringe every bit as much as watching a taping of an surgical procedure – scalpel, blood, organs and all – being performed on myself. Which I’ve never done, but that just came into my head, and I’m sure it can’t be any worse than listening to that early demo CD which is now four years old.

But it was a cool moment tonight. There were actually some good parts to the music and some cool arrangements. But I couldn’t help giggling all the way through the playing of the songs – partly from the nervousness of hearing such an old recording and my natural reaction of wanting to flee the room, but also because some of it was simply amusing in itself. The music, the way I sang the songs, the lyrics, at times made for a comical combination. I’m sure one day I will post one of those songs on my website. Not quite yet.

I guess, in the end, it became a day of recognizing the completion of a cycle. It felt right.

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